38mpg

Just because your dad is an ex-trucker and you uncle is a mechanic does not make me believe you when you say that your dad's new 199? Jeep Cherokee gets 38 mpg.

Didn't he just buy it and it can't even leave the driveway because the lady who sold it to him cut the belt?

Sushi

We find that our sushi tastes better when eaten off plates that resemble fish. Please note: this sushi doesn't even have fish in it and probably is not technically sushi, but what are you going to do about it?

Facial Hair Comparison

Over the past couple weeks since I styled my facial hair Easter Weekend I have received a couple comparisons, you know, the "you like like . . ." type of comment. I have nothing against these comments, actually I have come to relish them. After all, what fun is having facial hair if you don't use it to change your style or to make yourself look incredibly rediculous from time to time, or always.


me, Col. Robert Gould Shaw (portrayed by Matthew Broderick), V.I. Lenin, Ho Chi Minh